Love Poems

Between new york and hawaii

When we’re apart
I’m torn and scattered about
Dandelions
Dried and floating in the wind
Searching for somewhere to begin again
Tears smash my face
Loneliness
Disgrace
Shame
Such a big man
Such a big name
So much pride
Stretched too wide—
a Great Plain of endless pain.

Without you I’m dead inside
Infantile I cry and cry
No smile and I never laugh
a homeless man who needs a bath
You cleanse me—
I’m filthy and worthless,
collapsed
unable to move
without your love I’m ruined
without your caress—marooned
on a beach under the moon
shining gentle white
reminding me
if you come back
tonight I’ll be alright
If not I’m nothing
like money spent
empty and unrepentant
to be apart is a sin
one that should not happen

Custody mother fucker

First she took that red cherry on the end of her death stick
and pushed it into both ears of my eldest daughter
burning and turning her deaf to me and the world.
She couldn’t hear the song I sang called “Little Girl.”

Second, she cut out the eyes of my only son and forced
him to touch them in the bowl at the table
and told him he would never see me again.
John the Baptist ‘s head on a platter, blind boy “you don’t matter.”

Third, she sawed the hands off of my second daughter
and placed the stumps in boiling water.
All she did was write a letter
I was sick and sad and she said “get better.”

My third daughter she cut off her tongue.
So she could tell no one that she ‘loved Daddy.”
She did this so she couldn’t complain
that yes she wanted to be with Daddy again.

Then she burned all the photos showing love
and buried the ashes in a trove
along with her bloodied gloves
and falsely with her fabrications
she claimed she did it all for love.

Death sure beats lonely

No man is an island
but some castaway
some lost
others tossed
by big waves
washed up
on lonely shores
as if it were their life’s task
to examine sand
and saltwater interact
or winds that smack
their face with rains
that end only to dry
their dirtied clothes
and burn their skin
dehydrate

before it’s too late
a coconut is broken
that is heaven
the nourishment
not encouragement
the sustenance
without substance
stop teasing me God
stop pretending
there’s a way off this sand bar
stop it–I am a desperate soul
and all this painful solitude
pounds harder than any hurricane
you smash against
my little spot constructed
to prove I’m still human

the only simple plan is death
the only control to take my life
this isolation—unbearable—
so I swim like a drunk idiot
the great shark swirls around me
I leave it to Him to rip me open
instead he draws a circle
to protect me
a wolf howls—a fog horn
is this my salvation
–delivered by a wild beast
with rows of jagged teeth
and a random impulse
not to cut me in two—
riding a rusted vessel
smoking black at dawn
motors roaring angry
sure death is quiet
but it sure beats lonely
noisy toddlers
wake me up early
I’m coming home.

Deepest pools of pulsating red

the human heart water falls
over the edge of all common-sense
and with each breath I take I live
and am one breath closer to the last
what kind of contradictory path
do couples take when they love?

how can two hands withstand
the end of time for just one
how does the other further
towards new life
my precious wife
you’ve left me alone–a dried puddle
in the hot Hilo sun steamy blurry
there is no hell like a scorned woman
except a hard cold frozen man

Devil’s Club

has the largest leaves
and green that beams
from morn to eve
even though you thought you cleared
the sharp needles
later on blisters appeared

and that sweet rose
that drew you in
it cut you just when
you cut the stem
your red stained hand
is all that stands
between you and her

You had a chance with mistletoe
and hung it right above her door
you came early and stayed late
but she never left
until the neighbor returned her rake
chance was your mistake

As you turned you saw her lips
pressing his
and then you gathered sumac
and bought a bottle of wine
and sent it to them both
in the summertime.

All the flowers piled and cut
upon their caskets shut up
now you never feel put out
as the groundskeeper
mowing circles around the stones
and cutting the weeds always growing.

Father

Father’s Axe Against the Forest of Maine
Steel love
Steel heart
Not just a candle
Flickers and flashes
Too hot to handle
forest fire ashes
that’s all there’s left
a blackened field
with tortured stumps
that will not yield
their wooden twisted forms
to the blistering flaming winds.

Some of these old stumps
Had long past withstood blows
From hardened steel axes
That swung down cutting
gorgeous green trees
They felt sun light for the first time
it burned their sappy flesh
Men stood above them
after the branches crashed down
And they hollered “whoa”
Down goes the beautiful pine
Like an black elk shot dead
On broken knees.
But the stumps didn’t whine
They are the silent gravestones
Of the dead forests
In the end wood surpasses steel
It multiples with sun and rain
It grows and grows while steel is made
And makes a lovely shade
For children to play
And mothers to rest
And father’s to raid
eggs from the nests.

Dan O’Phelan….10/07

Little Girl

Oh when you were born, a miracle of life and love
I picked you up and held you tight
and whispered “I adore you” then “goodnight.”

I watched you close and listened to your sweet breath
All the while dancing with you being held
with the bright stars brilliant and the falling snow.

My November baby girl my precious gem,
My princess, my love, my heart strings played
A simple hymn: “Sweet Little Girl”
You had the power to make me cry
not because I was sad but happily your Dad
and I smiled wide with you darling at my side.

Our home could be here

on this green open field
our ceiling blue sky
our walls rolled hills
we could make love
in the grasses
gentle caresses
until the stars dim
and the orange sunrise

Our bed could be
soft leaves
over sand
and our bath
the lake as clear
as heaven

Our food from the trees
and the garden we grow
and the bottles of wine
from grapes in a row
purplish juice all squished
with our feet
as we hold hands
giggling endlessly

Our water the rain
our hearts one and the same
always with you is home
so lonely to roam
on these frozen fields
long gone is the harvest
no more can it yield
until Spring melts
away all sign of fear
and I run to you and say:
“Honey I’m here.”

Pink flower

a luscious petal
pink and gleaming in the morning sun
longs to reach the warmth of God
—stretches it’s form of run
—glowing it’s form of leap

bees carry it’s secret
messages beyond gold fields of wheat
and the herd of white sheep
—as infants mildly sleep

scent is the most elusive
love letter
wisps softer than whispers
silent caresses

my heart stops beating
long enough to say “I love you”
it starts again, I breathe
a sigh of relief

Each thought of you
–sweet oppression
my heart the cell
for love’s obsession

Pardon me dear love
hold my hand one more time
I’ll walk with you
to eternity
smiling happy.

She was the Nubian Queen

She was the Nubian Queen
navigating the Nile
as it widened
her white smile
poured across the world
milk across wheat fields
with warm wet love for all
from lips of a simple girl.
The sun bowed to her golden ring
her light more powerful than everything

She is my Ghanian bride
pregnant and perfect
a merri-go-round and round
a ferris-wheel up and down.
Her infant hears her song
and longs and longs
he shiftin’ and he movin’
he laughin’ and he groovin’
the elephants bow down too
and listen to him comin’
the calm before the storm.

The forest weeps with happiness
crystal clear drops of dew.
The birds rejoice on key
and I’m rejoicing too
‘cause my Ghanian bride joins me
for honeymoon we sail the seas
to Trinidad and Tobago
Listening to Calypso celebrating freedom.
singing Calyspso celebrating freedom.

Trinidad and Tobago Freedom! Freedom!
Now the Prince runs freely across the sandy beaches.
Now the Prince runs freely across the green grasses
He laughs and is singin’ “I love you Mama”
He laughs and he is singin’
“I love you Mama.”

So Much I Love You

Spin me sweet

orange radiant
hold me tight
golden pie
aromatic high
warm apple embrace
luxuriantly sweet
Blow me your kiss
like cottonwood seed
in the July wind
pouring from heaven
a waterfall bubbly
laughing now
empty as Zen

Twirl me round again
and again
throw me, clutch me, pull me in

The sunshine lifts your gentle stem
in the cool morning
your shiny bright orange grin
just begins to smile
then gradually it stretches out a mile
Your petals thin
as lipstick
luscious through and through
like whip creamed tongue
lapping silly yum yum
willy nilly nothing to do
but orange flower
with you I’m everything
without doing anything

Splash

Hot summer kisses,
waterfalls,
simple wishes,
all in all
to be close to you
is enough.
There lightening flashes,
your every breath,
a river of heat
over my chest
where, a pulsating beat,
a thundering
devours me,
or else myself
I wholeheartedly
abandon.
Either case
this is no random
love but a torrential downpour,
one not to ignore,
a baptismal rainstorm,
come on
the water’s warm!

Torn and dried rose petals

Torn and dried rose petals
Rusted and tired piles of metal
Death becomes you and I all the time
But love sublime
Conquers age
Or pain or guilt or hate or rage

Love is the spear that always flies
And the optimist’s alibi
The targets zoom by like silly birds
To hit one absurd
Ignorance is bliss
You’ve passed
Accept this last kiss
On your cold lips
Once rosy red now pale blue
Just two hues from birth to death
Any more just makes a mess
Of otherwise
Perfect simpleness.

Love is the child’s smile
Whose walked hot and hungry many miles
To see his beloved mama there
Quiet in the shaded area
She’s dying and he knows
Because he’s seen so many times
Other friends and family go
But still he smiles wide
Like the ocean shore

The sunset dances on the waves
Crossed by the dreams
Of those who misbehave
Believing things that can’t be true
But for the sake of loving you
Endlessly and often

A heart of steel softened

Valentine

Some poems weep and whine,
some wail from line to line,
some sing along the river Seine
and those that adore “thine”
this and “thou” that hymn.
Some start with yours and end in “mine”
or “you are” then end “I am.”
There’s poems bright as sunshine
that can turn a lover blind
and taste as fine wine
but nothing define.

Some poems don’t rhyme.
Some as bells clang and chime,
some space and time Einstein,
some signed, some no name,
but none are true
as you Valentine.

Where’d you go big daddy

You were the bright bouncing balls
colorful and full of sunshine.
You’d chase us and we’d climb you
—a Giant in our small world.
You’d listen too!
And ask us questions about everything in life!
What happened to you?

I see the pictures of your hard-red face
swollen and tired
but still I wait and desire
to hold your hand one more time.
Word is you took your life.
Where’d you go Big Daddy?
What happened to you?

Maybe I’m selfishly desperate
to see you smile.
It’s been a long painful while.
I try to collect the memories
chasing photos blowing from Minnesotan wind.
But grow tired as the sky devours them.

Mom ‘s eyes emptied when you died.
The shallow pond now has dried.
—a shadow of her former self.
Grandma said your buried
up top the Mississippi bluffs
across from Saint Paul, I went there once.
I could not feel you at all.
I feel so sad
without you Big Daddy.

You stood for me without condition
as no other soul could or would do.
And that debt I owe and know
I can never repay you.
All that’s left–a black outline
on the dry lake bed
without the waves of love.
All the fish are dead.

Where’d you go Big Daddy?
How could big become so small?
How could small disappear?
Ah—there you are my face in the mirror!
I see you now red and tired burned by the Sun.
You’ve never been still, always on the run,
hurrying quickly past piles of undone.

Yum yum yum

Delicious chocolate
melt me.
Your mouth the fire.
Flick me up and toss me
–my desire!

Moan till you hum
yum, yum, yum
groan baby groan
till you come
home to me Valentine
on your knees
preferably.
I’ll lift you upright
over my head
swing you round
throw you down on our bed
and lick you like a tasty treat
vanilla ice cream
and hot fudge meet.